a happy couple in therapy speaking with a counsellor

4 Things You Need to Know Before Starting Relationship Counselling

a happy couple in therapy speaking with a counsellor

Falling in love can be fast and easy, but maintaining a long-term relationship is a challenge.

After the excitement settles and opportunities for connection and closeness grow fewer and farther between, everyday responsibilities will begin to take over and raise some problems.

Unlike individual therapy, which generally focuses on you and your needs, couples therapy is about you and your partner. Marriage or couples counsellors aim to help partners overcome their relationship issues while also learning how to better communicate with one another.

Whether you keep having the same fight over and over again or can’t seem to agree on anything anymore, getting outside help can help you work through your problems and become better partners overall.

1. It Only Works if You Both Want It To

It’s natural to be resistant to couples therapy and try to solve your problems without outside help.

Quite often it’s one partner who suggests they seek couples counselling, though their enthusiasm and positive attitude towards therapy may eclipse the other’s hesitation.

For the therapy to work, both partners have to want the relationship to work, though the reason why doesn’t have to be the same. If your partner feels unsure about attending therapy, take the time to listen to their concerns with an open mind.

2. Don’t Wait Too Long

Couples who wait too long to start counselling often have a harder time overcoming their issues, as their problems have piled up and the gap between them has grown too wide.

When matters are left unresolved, they tend to fester and become worse than they were initially. Those unaddressed negative feelings will lay dormant until they explode at a later date.

Couples therapy is much more effective when both partners recognize they have a problem they can’t solve and have a common goal of resolving it with professional help.

3. Open Communication Mattersa couple sitting on their living room floor talking

Honesty and communication are the two key factors to making anything work.

When going into couple therapy, you have to willingly be open and honest with your therapist, even when shame and embarrassment threaten to take over.

Some couples have issues they prefer for others not to know about, and while that’s understandable, therapy won’t work if there are secrets and details not being shared. To truly get the most out of couples therapy and improve your relationship, you must put shame, guilt, and doubt aside to deal with the tough stuff.

4. Most of the Work Is Done Outside of Sessions

A critical detail to recognize is that a relationship will not miraculously fix itself after a few therapy sessions.

Couples therapy is meant to offer guidance and provide partners with the necessary tools to healthily work through future problems. It’s up to you and your partner to use these tips and do the work when you’re at home and feeling frustrated.

Remember, you and your partner are the ones responsible for fixing your relationship, not the therapist.

Maintain a Healthy, Happy Relationship With Couples Counsellingcouple holding hands in relationship therapy

Experiencing highs and lows in a relationship is perfectly normal.

However, when the arguments become more frequent and leave you both emotionally drained, it can make you feel unsure about how to move forward. This is where Capital Choice couples counselling can help, providing couples therapy targeted towards working through their specific problems.

If you believe you’re in a relationship that’s experiencing a stand still, get in touch with us today to learn more about our relationship counselling services.